Hello, ladies, look at your man, now back to me, now back at your man, now back to me. Sadly, he isn’t me, but if he stopped using that synthesized Tleilaxu crap and switched to geriatric Spice, he could smell like he’s me. Look down, back up, where are you? It's definitely not on a boat cause there ain't no freakin' water on this planet. What's on your hand, back at me. I have it. It’s a Weirding Module with two tickets to see Gurney Halleck. Look again, the tickets are now melange. Anything is possible when your man smells like Spice and not a lady. I’m on a worm.
(Of course, the picture on the t-shirt is wrong; the hooks should only have one actual hook at the end with which the rider holds on to the worm, not three. The Dune Encyclopedia has a picture which is reproduced here, for instance.)