A question in the CFz staff chat regarding the meaning of "complimentary upgrades" led to some silliness earlier today, with suggestions of the con telling you what a nice person you are each day, birds and mice waking you by drawing the curtains aside, Cinderella-style, and your plates and cutlery serenading you while you're having breakfast.
That brought to my mind one of my favorite Simpsons songs, and I spent 20 minutes writing a quick spoof — sing this to the tune of See My Vest:
Be our guest,
be our guest,
be a step above the rest!
Don't be muzzled
you deserve the very best!
Hugs from a fox,
a chocolate box,
– isn't that unorthodox! –
We will meet you,
we will greet you,
To the finest things we'll treat you!
Have a laugh
with the staff
rise above the riff and raff,
it'll be a golden ticket and a haaalf!
So don't protest,
Don't be stressed,
Get your fursuit and get dressed,
Be our veeery speeecial guuueeest!
I hope it's obvious which stanzas correspond to which in the original!
Wow, what are the odds? I never watched that movie, and never knew that song; I'd always assumed that it was in fact a Simpsons original. Quite amusing, then, that in rewriting it I took it back to its original title, but I suppose it's simply proof that GMTA. :)